Friday, September 23, 2016

Five...yes I have five.

There is a question that people always ask that I hate answering truthfully. I always try to be honest so why do I sometimes lie when I answer this question.

The main reason my answer changes is because it depends on who asks it. So what's the question I hear you ask...

It's a really simple one. I'm sure you are asked the same question often, just like I am...

"How many children do you have?" So what's the answer you may ask, and why does my answer change.

The answer is 5 I have 5 children. This is where it gets complicated. You see if you don't know me you see my three amazing kids. You see my oldest son, my middle daughter, and my cutie pie - growing to quickly baby.

What you don't see is that my oldest son is really #3 that my only daughter had an older sister, that my three youngest had an older brother. This is what you don't see.

Everytime I am asked that question the number 5 pops into my mind. However, then I stop and think...do I want this conversation. Do I want to say how my beautiful 2nd child was born stillborn when my oldest was just over a year old. Or how my then only child returned to her Heavenly Father when she was Three years, Nine Months, and 6 days (yes each one counts). So sometimes I lie, sometimes I say three because I don't want to go there, I don't want to see the looks of pity or the conversations about how hard it must be. But everytime my heart shouts five and everyday I remember and think of my other two angel. Of how my son would have loved his older brother, how my daughter wishes she had her sister.

So five,  I have five children although all you see is three.






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2 comments:

  1. oh ... but yay for those young... as heartbreaking it as it is... Yay for them...they are yours and you can celebrate them regardless yes?

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  2. Honesty is beautiful, though difficult - as you so clearly describe. It is clear how loved all five of your sweet children are. Thank you for sharing that love. - Lori

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